Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
Tuesday, October 05, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
It's been almost three years since I wheeled my measly belongings across the threshold of Virginia, and now almost a year and a half since I moved to Harrisonburg. To say it's been a long road would be like calling the Appalachian Trail a bunny slope. It's been a real long road. But, today, on this beautiful Saturday morning, after a cup of coffee and a stroll through the downtown farmer's market, I sat in my living room and wrote about how far I've traveled from the outlook I once held and how much I have come to love and even treasure this place and these people.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Saturday, August 07, 2010
Click on the title of this post to go to my house mates blog for a video of the fiasco (prepared to be bored by my "cooking show")-(you've been warned!)- (seriously though, it's boring) but mostly follow the link to read Lindsey's blog. It's new, and pretty awesome.
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Sunday, May 16, 2010
I've decided I HAVE to add an aside and tell a quick little anecdote. A day in the life of Amelie, if you will... (This came about because I was reading posts from the begining of the year laughing my head off and wondering how my blog went from funny to recently being somewhat boring and I realized I started posting so much about going RAW and blah blah blah and you can only say so much about that before you're suddenly talking to a roomful of snoozing people). So, having said that, here is my "Lesson Learned" numero uno installment in what I hope to be a very benefitial series where people can read my horror stories and laugh but at the same time never have to go through what I have for the sake of science, nay for the sake of mankind. You're welcome.
This morning I juiced 4 carrots and 2 bunches of parsley. My eyes have been irritated and this is the only thing that I can do to help them. I was late to babysitting, so I poured the cocotion into a glass and ran out the door. On the road, I took a sip. I've had carrot-parsley juice once before so I knew what to expect. But... this was not what I expected. I mean, yea I'd only had it once before, but wasn't it a little tastier... not so... garnishy...? And then all the pieces came together in my head, that day at the grocery store, looking at all the different parsleys (who knew parsley had so much versatility?), seeing the huge price difference from one parsley to the next, choosing the cheaper parsley, taking it home, juicing it, you get the idea. Basically, sitting at a red light on a rainy morning in which I had woken up to my babysittee's mother's call ("weren't you coming this morning at 8am?"), I realized I had bought not parsley parsley, but garnish parsley. Parsley you find on plates a restaurants that you dare some one to eat. Parsley that is bushy and chokey. Parsley that is the son of a motherless dog. Garnish. And let me tell you... Garnish parsley and parsley parsley are so very different, I see that now. And I can't believe I didn't catch that at the grocery store. From this day forward I vow never to just buy the cheaper thing for cheapness sake. I will find 1 other good reason to get it cheaper or else I'll get the more expensive one. And that way I will ensure never to be so rudely awakened at 8:45 am not by a peeved mother looking for her babysitter but by a glass of carrot-bush juice strangling me with it's chalky chokiness.
Family. Why do people brag about their families as if they were able to pick and choose through a catalog for their great aunt Vidalia who sat next to Pocahontas at a book club? We have no more to do with where we are born into than a drop of rain chooses which puddle to splash into. No, we can't decide who our families are, but someOne did for us. It was all so masterfully thought out from before the age of time where each little being should be born and raised and into what family they should find themselves.
That is why I feel so blessed. To be so intentionally placed, to be chosen for a specific time and place in this world is to have a purpose all in itself that we cannot know but must trust. And family is the epicenter of it all. Where it all begins, happens and ends. Our lives and the changing times swirl around us like a wisp of a dream but our families are the real anchor that ties us to a specific harbor in a specific land. And try as we might to cut the cord, we only hurt ourselves. For when that cord is cut or even loosened, we start to sink ourselves, and we find that what we thought was keeping us bound from a life of adventure on the high seas was actually keeping us from getting swept away with the yellow sea foam, blown and tossed by the wind, or worse: drowned by the rushing and ever-changing currents of the deep deep ocean.
What most people never learn about their "family anchors" is that, like real boat anchors, they serve more purpose than just keeping you in one spot. Anchors are only reeled out every once in a while, when the wind gets rough and the waves get big. Mostly, they are just a part of the identity of the ship, not like they are a vital part of the everyday life of the ship, but, if a storm hits, you better believe they quickly become an integral part of the wellbeing of the ship. And if you knew what you were about, you wouldn't just willingly hop into a boat without a reliable anchor, especially in these crazy times of earthquakes and volcanos... no no, a good anchor is much prefered.
Can you tell I'm going home in a few days? :]
Saturday, May 01, 2010
The "food" industry. Now, why doesn't that sounds strange? Because it is normal for an industry to make food. But, we often overlook that it is only for profit. And how is food that was made for profit going to be the best there is for you? Why do plants grow produce? One purpose and one purpose only: fuel. There's no money involved in a plant's agenda. When money is involved everything it touches is instantly tainted. Maybe not completely marred, but DEFINITELY tainted. In "foods" case, it's despicable. The products we buy at the grocery store were made for one thing: to turn a profit. At the end of the day, that's what corporations have as their absolute bottom line: how can we make more money. Granted, there are a few out there who are less greedy than others, I have met billionaires with hearts of gold. But, the "corporation" doesn't have a heart, even though it's legally a "person." A corporation is legally obligated to put profit before any other factor. This applies especially with short-term profit that often has a long-term consequence. (If you can't tell I just watched "The Corporation" documentary and I highly recommend it. Go get it at your local library or rent it, it's worth the trip! Anyways, enough on that tangent. Basically, I'm enraptured by raw foods and how simple yet impossible it all is to just do what we were made to do.
And that applies to all areas of life that fascinate me: Why is it so dang hard to just do what we were made to do?! Be male or be female, be loved and love, create life and care for it, to pass peacefully into eternity. Why is there so much entangling each of these things, making it sometimes impossible to distinguish between just living and truly living. And what is living and what is blah blah blah...
Keep It Simple Stupid. Just do what we were created to do. The simpler the better. Alas, therein lies the uber-rub: the infinite complexity of simplicity.
Sigh... Even though we've come full circle, I don't feel disheartened. I am lead by the Spirit and it's natural. I am drawn to what is natural. And simplicity is natural for me. But, that's not the case for everyone. I spend my spare moments helping/coercing my fellow housemates to Goodwill half their wardrobe and toss the other half. Not to mention the Mount Everests of "stuff" that for some is painfully difficult to part with. To them I simply say: "Poo Poo" like Madeline would. The end.
No but seriously, go through your room and get rid of half of what's in it. You won't regret it. I do it 8 times a year and I have only regretted getting rid of something twice in my life. PRACTICE parting with "stuff." It can only be good for you in the long run. You can't argue that, my friend. You just can't argue with nature. And nature keeps it simple... stupid :]
Friday, April 23, 2010
Jenna Norwood- 30 days raw documentary maker. cool chick. owned raw food restaurant in dc? now travels around giving talks about raw food
David Wolfe- raw food guru, runs a clinic in san diego that jenna norwood attended called 'optimum health institute'
jennanorwood.com- updates on her new documentary that is in pre-production, video demonstrations of raw recipes, articles, etc...
davidwolfe.com-check out the guru
juicefeasting.com- resource for raw and a 92-day juice fast
crazysexycancer.com- story of chris carr, girl who kicked cancer by eating raw
goneraw.com- resource for raw recipes.
rawmodel.com- a model who is raw.. and so hotttt.
veganbodybuilder.com- for those interested in if people who eat raw can still do rando stuff like bodybuilding...
runningraw.com- ultra-marathoner Tim VanOrden (who also made the documentary "Protein Myth") and is raw
meetup.com- a way to get connected with local co-ops in your area
Documentaries to watch:
Supercharge Me! 30 Days Raw
Protein Myth - on youtube
Comments to remember:
"Pay now or pay later" refering to question about cost of raw food in relation to cost of long-term health problems
"You cannot solve your problems with the same mind that created them" -Einstein
"Eating out with friends becomes less about the food and more about the company" refering to question of socializing with a raw lifestyle
One guy got up and gave a little testimony about his life with raw foods. He said the best way to start that lifestyle is by first and foremost getting rid of all cravings (he did that via the 'questionable' detox method called the "master cleanser fast") and then the next thing to do is investigate "superfoods" that quench cravings in a raw way... hm.
Tonight my question is what should the focus of this post be? I have a million little fragments of rabbit trails I would love to chase down on a keyboard, but to me posts are only fun to read if they are on specific topic. So, I really should pick just one.
A couple days ago I attended a documentary showing of "Supercharge Me! 30 Days Raw" by Jenna Norwood, who was at the showing to discuss and answer questions. I went by myself, found a seat next to another lone viewer and tried to strike up friendly conversation. She wasn't having it, so I ended up pretty bored just sittin' around for 20 minutes waiting for the thing to start. Jenna was obvious to pick out of the people wandering around the theater. She had a glow that I've noticed coming from several other raw and/or organic people in the area. One woman who works at Kate's Natural Foods in town- I swear looks younger and healthier every time I go in there. Something about natural foods has caught my fancy in that way, in the way that I see people who treat their bodies to live food are treated well by their bodies. If that makes sense. Anyway, she had "the glow" and we introduced ourselves to each other and she commented on what a beautiful name Amelie is and how it's one of her favorite movies. If I had a quarter for every time some one said that to me I would have an endless supply of chicklet gum... yup. That's what I'd do with all those quarters. No doubt in my mind.
The program started and I had to admit my expectations after the begining credits shrank to 25% of what they had been. It was starting to feel like a home video. "Oh rats" I thought to myself. "How long is this thing going to drag." But, it DID pick up. It DID redeem itself. It was fascinating. Basically, Jenna Norwood (from Washington, DC, woot woot) wanted to lose some weight and heard about a detox clinic in San Diego that was based on the "raw food diet" of, well, completely raw vegitation. Nothing cooked at all, raw raw raw. So, she set out to document her journey through this "cutting edge" (was filmed in 2005) diet (which if you think about it is actually thousands of years old) and how she became a full fledged believer in the raw lifestyle. It quickly shifted from a shallow desire to look good in a leotard to a spiritually awakening, mentally invigorating, physically empowering experience that she tours around the country advocating for to this day. It's powerful stuff, this raw food. I have to admit I'm totally into it. I mean, I've piddled around with the Maker's Diet and this and that detox and bleh bloh blah, but THIS! This is like.... a whole other level. Am I ready for this? I want to be, but I dunno... I looked up the Optimum Health Clinic in San Diego that Jenna attended for three weeks of her 4 week challenge and found the cost to be minimally tallied at 3,000 bones. I would give my left eyebrow to ship off to San Diego for three weeks, but I don't have 3,000 bones, not in my body and certainly not in my pocket. Oh well, maybe one day.
Jenna did say you don't need to go to a clinic to get started. But, is there really any other way? A gradual "ease" into the "RAW" lifestyle just doesn't even fit into the same sentance together. Like trying to ease yourself out of a bandaid. Better to just rip it off, right? Saaaame thing.
Needless to say I walked away from the seminar with so many thoughts and ideas running through my head and they are still running through my head tonight: should I go raw what will people think what would my family say but it's not what anyone thinks! but it's too expensive but would I rather 'pay now or pay later' (famous "raw" saying, refering to the fact that you can either pay more for raw food now, or pay later in doctor bills and prescription pills and yes I thought about that for a second so that I could rhyme that). Also I just wonder about what life is like without things like pastries and coffee and bread and jelly and meat! Is a life without those things worth living? That is the question that always swings me back to where I am. I refuse. I REFUSE to be one of those miserable people who is unhappy because they don't enjoy food anymore. But, according to Jenna, your taste buds adapt after a detox and you start craving the things you're eating.
There is much more research to do. I've already checked out all the websites Jenna gave me and done some minor calculations. Subconsciously, I haven't gone to the grocery store all week, because I think maybe I can just stop buying things like noodles and pasta sauce. The truth is, I already bake my own bread, buy grass-fed chicken eggs, non-pasturized milk, butter, spinich, kettle corn (:]) and herbs all from local farms. Problem is none of those things are considered "raw". Not really. Because they come from animals. On the internet there are various arguments both ways about needing dairy in your diet. One guy (rawmodel.com) suggests that you can't really be sustained your whole life without dairy. Another, David Wolfe, of countless bestseller books and top-rated websites, an allround "raw guru" insists it's unnecessary and his life and times reflects that as well. Who's right? Bah, if only I had a million dollars to invest in finding out for myself.
I do know that since my pantry has run itself almost completely out and I've only bought fruit since the seminar, I was doin' the raw thang for most of the day, then scavenged a piece of bread... and I felt it. I felt that my stomach was telling me something. Telling me the bread was no good. And it was homemade banana bread with wheat flour. It was almost healthy. By the worlds standards it would receive the gold star of eat-without-conscience. But, after going only one day basically "raw" already my stomach had found itself enough voice to muster a weak protest as I gulped the morsel down. That is the strange thing about our guts. And I have researched this. And experimented. And I can tell you the gut is almost as communicative as the brain and heart, in fact.. ( I LOVE telling people this) doctors (ask any of them) will tell you that in the scientific world the gut is refered to as the "second brain." Why? Because, when you were an embryo, and a mass of ganglion was forming inside your little bod, it separated into two parts, my friend. One half of this mass travels upwards to your head and weeks later has evolved into your brain. What happened to the other half is just crazy. Just insane. The other bunch of ganglionic nerve endings travels down to your gut. There it grows embeded in the walls of your stomach and the surrounding area. Thus, your gut has a major capacity to communicate feelings, thoughts, etc... The only problem is, esp. here in good ole America is that we eat so poorly, our baseline for how we feel in our guts is much worse that it would naturally be if we ate better. Jenna also spoke of this. She said once she had cleared all the bad toxins and grossness out of her body, she had a clear pathway for communication with her gut. If she ate a piece of cheese, her stomach had a nice clean phone line to dial in and tell her how cheese made it feel. Normally, at least for me, the cheese is just piled on top of a long list of unhealthy or allergic things that I have never given it the chance to sort through, added to the numbing baseline. I wonder what kind of things my tum would say if I gave it half a listen. I hope I'm making sense because I have been typing for entirely too long and I still have way too much to say.
Another time. To be continued.
Thursday, April 08, 2010
I concocted a potion of cranwatergingercinnamonnutmegorangeandlemon last night and this morning woke up at 6 and started my hourly swap of a cup of water, cup of potion, etc... to have gone on until 10pm only I didn't make it to 10pm. So close, but no, I made it until 8pm and then flipped out and went crazy on my belly. I was suddenly dizzy, a pounding headache, tierd, moody, I couldn't take it, I guess I wasn't ready for the full effect. So, when I got home I downed applesauce, noodles and cinnamon bread and am now slurping the last drop of warmed milk out of my mug. To hell with the detox!
No, but really I think it's an important part of the human diet to fast once a week and I do want to get better at it. So, next Thursday I try again. This time I may make it to 9pm.
Sidenote: I have officially been blessed leaps and bounds by sticking to (for the most part, and better than anything I have ever tried to stick to) my goals I wrote up over a month ago. I can't wait to share how meaningful the last 47 days have been in getting me where I am now. As this exact moment however, I think I might barf, so I'm off to bed. Brb.
Wednesday, April 07, 2010
Moving along... I'm doing a real interesting deto- OK, I have to stop there to make a note. Something I notice and actually really love about human interaction is how we pick up on other peoples isms. Since I've lived in my new house with eight girls, I have picked up numerous phrases from them and from our outside friends. Mostly they are fake words we use to describle people/situations. Everyone does it. One such word/phrase our house has been infiltrated by is using "real" instead of "really." Like, "it was real awkward" or "that's gotta hurt real bad." Try it, it's fun- and once you do you can never go back to saying really when describing an adjective. It becomes superfluous. Silly even. Alright then, back to what I was saying. I am doing a real interesting detox tomorrow. It's like a cranberry spice drink. I'm gonna let ya know how it goes. Should be real cool. Hope I don't die.
Thursday, April 01, 2010
I have definitely been reading a lot more, and am loving that. I am amazed at the world and how interesting every little thing is! Life is full of things I know nothing about and that is a relief. "The world is such a wonderful place. Ladeeda ladadeeda" (Band of Horses).
I just finished 'Beautiful Boy: A fathers journey through his son's addiction' by David Sheff. Ahhmazing. After reading that I went to the library and looked up everything they had on methamphetamine. All I can say is: how can I help? People on meth are unlike any other addicted group. It's fascinating and harrowing and I felt like there should be something I can do, even if it's just learning more about it. David Sheff is an unbelievable communicator and incorporated so much information into the story that I feel like I earned a PhD on drugs/drug addicts by the time I turned the last page, which only took me a few days to get to. More on meth to come... :)
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
I baked a mondo cake in this thick glass casserole dish and while I was taking it out of the oven, my housemate was finishing up her omelet on the stove. So, she moved her pan off the burner and I immediately plunked the dish down right in the newly free space, neither of us noticed the burner was left on. Two minutes later, I'm reading on the couch in the living room waiting for the cake to cool so I can icing it, and i hear the densest "crack!" I've ever heard! It was a solid "crack!" like a whip, but thicker... it was sweet. I knew right away it was the glass dish. I peeked into the kitchen and sure enough there were millions of pieces of thick brown glass EVERYWHERE. It was a nightmare to clean up, but looking back, it was the sweetest experience I've had with shattered cookware. Why, it even tops the time my mom inadvertently dropped a glass 6 cup Pyrex on my head and it broke in three pieces. It's never been proven conclusively if it had any affect on my brain/skull. Jury's still out... :/
Friday, March 19, 2010
As all things do, this blog has evolved and I would be doing the world a diservice if I didn't follow the natural flow of life. I'm still doing the challenge, (went home for 2 weeks, dawdled, got myself back into shape, and kept plugging along) but I'm bored of it being the focus of my blog. There are so many interesting things stemming off of the movement towards my goals that I can't hardly stand it!
So, without further ado, this segement is going to be about noodles. Just kidding. This segement is going to be about diapers. Gotchya again. This segement is actually really going to be about how I got fired from my job at the Elks Lodge. Sort of. ... ..... dramatic pause.... aaand que lights...
Arriving back in Harrisonburg after being in paradise (aka home, aka New Orleans) for two weeks was like going from the tanning bed to the tredmill. Still at the gym, but two totally different pieces of gym equipment. I am never going to use that analogy again. I promise. That was horrible. Anyway, it wasn't that I was annoyed to be back, I was glad to get back to taking care of my life, doctors apointments, babysitting, taxes, friends, all of it, but it was definitely an adjustment of pace. Also I finally was taking an antibiotic for my "sinusitis" (yes, it's actually called that...booooriiiing) and feeling kind of like I needed to take things one at a time. But, the day after I got back, I realized I was scheduled to work at the Elks from 3-7pm. I thought, I can't do that to myself. And asked the other two bartenders (one of which is my roomate) if they could cover for me. Jessie had a lab and Kaitlyn was already scheduled at her other job. So, I just decided to call Moe the bar manager and ask if he could do it. [Sidenote: Moe is not like other managers. He is allllwayyyyys at the bar, so if you ever need him to cover, he's like "yea, sure." It's been fantabulous. Ok... sidenote complete.] So lateeda no big deal I ring up Moe and tell him the sitch, "What do you think? Can you work for me?"
"Uhhh... siiiiiiiiiiighhhhh.... Actually... I've been putting this off, but..."
He fired me. Right there on the phone. Right then and there.
Well, that's not totally fair, I guess. He "let me go" and it was "mutual" on my part. But, it was unreal and I was pretty surprised. Out of noooowhere.
One might stop to think at this point in the blog.... This is just an example of Amelie's inability to grasp that she was not doing her job and really Moe was putting off something that probably needed to happen months ago.
And you would be wrong.
When I tell you that working at the Elks Lodge entailed NO skill in ANYTHING whatsofreakinever. I mean I mean it. You go, you sit, you facilitate alchoholism, you lock up. And of course you get to know the guys and swap stories and laugh and cry and just basically do what humans inately do: relate. S'that simple. Butttttt.... obviously that can't be the whole case because there I was on the phone with Moe: shocked, confused, hurt, happy, hysterical! I went through all these emotions distinctly. Oh my gosh, are you serious? First of all... whaaa? What are you saying? I don't understand... Ohh, I see.... Well... sniff sniff, I see... Well, hmm, that's too bad. Well, my sinuses have been acting up because of all the smoke in the place anyway, well I guess this was good, then. Hmhm, hehe, hee hee, ha ha.... bwahahahahahahahha!!! I can't believe this! This is hilarious! (after I got off the phone of course). Jessie, wait till you hear this... what? He just fired you too? Bahahahahahaha!!!!
I'm telling you people. The situation was completely UNREAL! So, there you have it. Both Jessie and I were "let go" due to inexplicable circumstances roughly laid in unrelated excuses.
But, from the blathering and it's-not-up-to-me-'s, it became somewhat apparant that neither Jessie or I were "aggressive" enough. There you have it. They got rid of us so they could pick up some hussies.
Well, if that's the case then it's a complement to be gotten rid of. I thought I had some good relationships, I thought I was getting to know the guys, satifying the human need for relating and caring, but I'm here to tell you that's not what they were looking for. And no one had the guts or grace to tell me that 9 months ago when I started working for them. Thanks. Thanks a lot. And then it all came out in one phone call, months of whining (I'm sure) for a more "aggressive" bartending female, months of talking about Amelie the "she's-too-quiet" bartender for them to finally grow a pair and eek out a pro-action. Actually, they never grew a pair, they forced "Moe the manager" to do it. Moe. The only Elk that ever really loved me. They made him do it. On the phone I knew he was upset about it and had been putting it off because it was the last thing he wanted to do. But, as I can only now assume, they complained and nagged like mean old housewives until he could take it no longer. Wimps. Part of me wanted to go in there during the fullest bar-time and call everyone out on their wimpyness. Cowards! But, after a couple of days to cool down, I realized this would do no good, and turned in my keys like a meek little lamb at the slaughter. Am I tooting my own horn here? Yes. I'm sorry about that...
Honestly, it's so good to be done with that job. My immune system took a huge fall from all the constant billows of smoke I choked down every day. Not to mention the emotional and psychological damage of watching so many older men waste their lives away one day at a time. I can only imagine the amount of damage done to my lungs and body. Thankfully, I read somewhere that a twenty-two year olds body can completely regenerate it's lungs in 6 months, even lungs with extensive smoke damage. So... fingers crossed. You can do that until your twenty-six and then something changes and you're stuck with what you got. So, that can be your fun fact of the day. Needless to say, I am on the job market again and stoked about it.
This rounds on me, boys!
Friday, March 05, 2010
Wednesday, March 03, 2010
Monday, March 01, 2010
But it was not any of these shows that kept me up. It was this video. Watch it. It's interesting.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Harrisonburg Saturday night: All you can bowl at Valley Lanes.
There's good and bad to living in a small 'townie' town...
Good: You have fewer friends, but they are good friends. You appreciate what a big city has to offer and it makes it a huge treat to travel to Charlottesville and DC. You can walk/bike to the store, the bank, the library, you name it. You start to recognize people/people walking past are friendlier/waiters remember you from last week :]. Makes it fun to go to community art show, etc... and feel like you are a member of society. Most if not all business is relationally based ("Tell 'em Earl sentchya" style)
Bad: Small towns are so boring! Besides the bars and the bowling alley, you gotta be pretty creative when you go out. Everyone stalks everyone and it's impossible to do anything and not have people talking about it, esPECially go on a date. gasp.
I have successfully avoided falling into spending multiple weekends at the bowling alley and the bar. Tonight was my first bowling experience. Depending on the crowd, it's fun. But, you do get a feeling of losing yourself in a bowling alley. Losing part of you that is able to find "cool" things to do even in a small town. It's like you're admitting "yeah, I tried to think of a fun way to spend my Saturday night, but I ended up at the bowling alley anyway." But really, once you get over yourself, bowling is fun. I just don't like that it may actually be one of the only things to do in Harrisonburg. Linds and I have to make a consciously committed effort to go to the "other" side of town where all the college apartments are once every couple of months or so, just to remember that there are crazy fun things happening somewhere nearby. Even if it's only because they involve beer pong and cigs. And damned if I don't ask a guy out for no other reason than to get to know him. One date. Let them chatter about it for weeks after. I have an agenda that won't be derailed by small town syndrome. In some ways, small towns force you to find out who you really are when the drizzle hits the fan and people might actually judge you outright for your decisions and lifestyle. In a huge city, people are so lenient. Believe what you want, live how you want, everyone is accomodated for in a large city. In small time college towns, where people who went to preschool with you are in your college science lab class, you live in a glass house built by the people around you and they make most of your life decisions for you. Of course I'm talking about extremes here, I really don't personally feel victimized by this in a big way, but I do catch the scent of it regularly and see the effects of it on other people. It's a real problem. Now's a great time to mention that Harrisonburg, VA is the meth capitol of the US. Yeahup. Wonder why. CUZ PEOPLE CAN'T ESCAPE THIS PLACE! People walk around like they're trapped. Trapped in a fishbowl. Tell me that's not scary. The devil has a hold on a lot of souls here and small town syndrome is the main form of control. Going to extremes again, but sometimes I get that feeling from this city and it's a heavy feeling that takes a while to pass through. I mean, I fall into small town syndrome all the time myself. It's hard not to. But, it helps to visit friends in Arlington/Charlottesville and get a good shaking and to re-realize how much bigger life is than Harrisonburg.
Life is bigger than Harrisonburg. Bigger than DC. Bigger than Virginia. Bigger than me. Typing "bigger" so many times makes me notice how weird a word it is... and how close it is to "booger."
Friday, February 26, 2010
So, yes, life is good. Earlier today I locked the keys in my car, but right now that doesn't matter, it's over. Earlier today, I had to change a poop diaper, but now it's just a distant memory.
Sidenote: I get free raw cow's milk now! I drive out into the country once a week and pick it up. There's a little donation box inside the fridge in the garage where I get it, and I stick a $5 in there, and I'm golden. Every one in my house things I'm a weirdo, but they will all come around. And I'll be the one laughing when everyone gets the flu but me because of the enzymes I now get daily.
Ever since I started this goal-thing I have been sucking at anything "mental" I try to do each day. Crossword puzzles become algorithms, sodoku is like a cruel joke of the gods... But, I am muddling through, surprisingly. It is hard, though, to work out every day. Esp today when I babysat all morning till lunch and then locked the keys in my car and then HAD to watch twilight and new moon all in a row with my housemates and here I am blogging now and I'm trying to think of ways I got exercise today and actually, I did. I did if you count chasing two kids with poopy diapers (they are surprisingly motivated scurriers) for 3 hours and then walking 10 blocks from where my keys got locked in the car all the way home... yes, I don't feel guilty when I submit that I did get at least 45 minutes of solid exercise.
Today I read out of 'Jesus Calling'... "I am leading you, step by step, through your life... Your future looks uncertain and feels flimsy- even precaurious. That is how it should be... When you try to figure out the future, you are grasping at things that are Mine... I will show you the next step forward... trust Me to open up the way before you as you go."
"Uhh... um? I was supposed to pick up a couch today? You're Wendy, right?"
"Yes, I'm Wendy... umm"
"Weird, I just talked to you on the phone..."
"Ohhhhh, honey, there are THREE Wendys on this block."
"Oh, OK, I must have accidently wrote 702 instead of 709"
"Well... feel free to come back and get a manicure"
Neil: "Oh yea, I'll be back!"
So, we drove a few feet further and out comes Wendy #2 from the house. MUCH younger. A cougar, in fact. Took one look at Neil and that was it.
"Oh HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!! Come on in!..."
And so the convo progressed, she was bouncily sharing about her divorce four years ago and how she's been alone ever since eyeing him, smiling.
Finally, she takes us to the couch and from the front view, I was impressed. She shampooed it and everything. But, as soon as we moved it away from the wall and I lifted one end with Neil on the other, I looked at the bottom-side of the couch -what was now inches away from my face- and literally got a mouthful of black fuzzy cat hair ON MY TONGUE. A mouthful. The back and sides of the couch were COVERED in cat hair. It was deeesgusting. It didn't help that she was a smoker-cougar, so the couch smelled like smoke. She failed to mention that in the ad... But, no matter. Thirty bucks? Totally worth it. I took it home and washed all the pillow covers, lint rolled the shizz out of the whole thing, and sprayed an ENTIRE bottle of extra strength febreze on the cushions, set them outside to air out last night and today. I just put everything back together tonight and I actually think I licked the cig smell (hmm, literally and figuratively)! And that cat hair is ancient history. But, you know even though it doesn't smell like a smoking cougar, it doesn't smell like me yet, ya know? It hasn't adapted to it's new home. So, it's smell (a fresh laundry meets air freshener meets shirt you smoked in that was left at the bottom of the laundry basket for a few weeks) is kind of still overpowering the whole room. I am confident it will turn from the dark side and surrender to my scent in due time. I want to be sensitive to the couches needs too. It was just ripped from it's home and put in a new surrounding. So, it's adjusting, I'll give it that time.
I prayed over it last night though, honestly, because I just got the feeling like that household was not a safe/holy place, if that makes sense... and I felt that lingering spirit from it's former home.
Long gone now though, thank ye Jesus :)
OK, blogspot.com sucks. I don't understand how to move pictures around! Dumb dumb dumb I am so frustrated I can't think! I hate these moment-ruiners! Whatevs. Here is my bookshelf that I don't have books for, so... here is my fan/luggage/glass bottle shelf:
And... another view :) with the flash.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
When geeks have twins:
Sometimes it's OK to look at the past day, feel crappy, but turn around and laugh at something like this and feel good again :] Am I right? Am I right??
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
thank the Lord for
PM yoga the night before
I adore You more
this morning because
You saw through the blue and gave a warning
to me You said "hey don't have a pity party
your life is complete in me that's the story
morning glory" I felt loved for the sign
because today was a horrible reminder
that in a moment everything can change
your life your finances your food your rent and more
but take heart "your hard work will be rewarded
so please keep your eyes on Me
I'll see you through from blue to more blue"
If that didn't make sense... it's OK. It's my first rap ever and I didn't really read through it after I wrote it sooo... But yea, today was a good day all in all. Hard but that's life sometimes. I guess I could list all the crap, but I don't even want to. I want to keep my eyes on Jesus and I'm pretty sure if I do then everything will magically fall into place. Yay God!
I read a sweet Proverb this morning, "The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity." It made me think of how when I'm at a store and the cashier doesn't scan all my items and I think "sweet dude, free stuff"... that's duplicity. Even though no one knows, and definitely no one cares, especially not the cashier. My sister once had this happen and went back in the store to pay for the missed item, it was $50. She said, "it's not worth sacrificing my integrity over." At that moment I didn't understand. As soon as I read that verse this morning, I thought back to that moment, and I did understand. And I think I'm going to remember that/this for as long as I live.
Later I went for a run and ouch running sucks people I don't enjoy it at ALL! You have to spit every 5 seconds, you have to be in public, you have to hurt all over, you have to... spit... n stuff. Anyways it's just one of those things I don't want to pursue, like snowboarding. I know, I know, that's not cool, but whatevs I'm just tryna be transparent whichyall...
For some reason my crossword/sudoku skills were off today. It's Tuesday, the second easiest day in the week for that stuff and I couldn't finish either one. No matter, I threw the paper away quickly to avoid people noticing. And by people I mean the Elks Lodge members I bartend for. They really don't care. Some day I'm going to have a whole separate blog about the Elks Lodge. It's a treasure chest of wealth and knowledge that needs to be passed on to the blogging world. One day...
I met some friends for drinks downtown at one of my fav places, Clemetine. Then we all played Mario Kart for entirely too long. And that's why I'm blogging for Day 49 so late. And that was my day.
Monday, February 22, 2010
The woman whose kids I babysit for on Monday mornings blew up at me for leaving a "can't babysit" message on her phone 5 hours before she needed me to babysit. Sorry, I live in a world of people who if they had to choose between their best friend and their cell phone for who to save from falling off a cliff, would save their phones, so I don't understand people who don't check their missed calls like every 5 seconds. That said, it was irresponsible and I felt like a dumb jerk.
Then, I had to chase down my car keys at a four seasons resort 30 minutes outside of the city so I could take my car at LEAST 30 minutes outside of the OTHER side of town to get the oil changed by a guy named Rick who laughed in my face for not having a registration sticker on my MINI -FREAKIN'- VAN that I drive every day. And I just sat there and smiled, crossword puzzle in hand. I could have punched him, I thought about it, weighed my options, but decided I wasn't that kind of person, at least not today. This is MY LIFE people, this is not a drill. What the hell are we living for. Talk about a reality check. All I can say is I am so glad God has a purpose for me here and that I am doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing, dodge caravan and all. (and that's a dodge caravan sport just so every one knows, I am proud of her, our little Sylvie).
Needless to say, it was a full day. whiney kids, offended mothers, chuckling auto shop men, and goal-oriented Amelie... just tryna fulfill my goals man! Get off my back! Just tryna fulfill my goals.
I also made plans today to pick up a used couch off of craiglist (it's not the devil, people, craigslist is our friend). I can and quite possibly will post a pic of it at the end of this post. And I've been meaning to post a pic of my Jesus candle, because it's the one and only candle in this world that I love the way many people love many candles. I don't understand buying candles, but I saw it in the Food Lion and I had $7 to spend on food, and I bought it, prayed over it, and say what you will it is holy. I lit it and did some yoga today, actually. Anyway, the couch is adorable. I'm going to ask a guy neighbor (nicely, and with cookies) if I can borrow his truck for Thursday afternoon. Yay, I can't wait!
The food goal of this 50 days is going to be tricky. I don't eat bad, but I do eat cheap. So, while I will avoid cookies and fast food and things of that nature, I do eat PB&J's and ramen noodles. Literally my diet consists of french press and egg/ham/cheese/jelly sandwiches for breakfast; PB&J for lunch, and ramen for dinner. Period. But, I will jot down some more specific guidelines tonight, thought. For no other reason than to use another piece of paper. P.S. one of my favorite things to do in life and something I get 100% pleasure from is writing things down on blank sheets of paper. Anything. Anything and everything. 'Nuff said. Moving on...